With all the hoopla going on in the American presidential election, it was only a matter of time before more of that came up north, and only a matter of time before someone thought to take advantage of it.
And this is why we came to “Woody’s” today. They had a special menu to help you solidify your candidate choice via burger. Both are basically the same, one was full of baloney and puns, and the other spam and its own saucy play on words. We would soon get a taste of both.
I only heard about the pub because of this promotion. So driving to it, I was surprised at how busy it was on a Thursday, and how many laps I had to take around the lot to find a spot. In fact when came out after our meal, a few drivers saw it fit to make their own stalls, parking where no lines existed. It wasn’t until we entered did I realize the additional buzz was due to the New England Patriots game, along with other sporting matches playing across all their wall to wall television screens.
The setting was your run of the mill bar across three rooms. A stage for live music, a waxed wood floor for any dancing, and plenty of cushiony booth seats. We were made to feel comfortable, which was nice considering the need to wait and the feeling that they were short staffed. It was a busy night, furthered by a prize draw every 30 minutes.
We were each give a raffle ticket, two were dropped off at our table without an explanation. In the main room, an announcer spoke and called names and number. We really had no context, but after the three rounds of prizing, our number was actually called and we had won. Our prize was a cooler, a ball cap, and a tee shirt. None of it we need, it was just more fun that we had won. Especially as we were planning to leave, but me not being able to find my keys delayed us. Proof in my belief that everything happens for a reason, good or bad.
As I mentioned earlier, it felt like there weren’t enough servers. We were left waiting after our hostess gave us our menus. So when we were finally noticed, we made sure to ask all our questions and order everything we wanted, all at once. A server passing by was kind enough to take our order. She explained that our intended server was now slammed and that she would be taking care of us going forward. And she did a good job of that, clearing our empty plates and completing circuits of check ins.
What impressed me most about our destination was the variety of people they brought in, and the variety their menu offered to them all. Burly men in leather, a couple of elderly Korean couples out on double date night, sports enthusiasts in jerseys, and women in visibility vests looking for an after work drinking hole, and a large group of business professionals in power suits and tie. And here we were looking for a comfy place to eat at in our sweats and faded jeans.
The menu was an extensive read, but it gave you confidence, just as the exterior of the restaurant did. They have been “serving the community since 1934”, and proud to have that on signs and as the header of the menu. They prided themselves on “making their food with love” and “serving (it) with pride”, for those who love “homemade comfort food.”
They had your regular and run-of-the-mill bar cuisine with comfort eats like tacos, chicken tenders, calamari, and potato skins. Perfect appetizers for some more dressed up burgers, sandwiches, pizzas, and wraps. There was a shrimp caesar, some lamb lollipops, “steak Neptune” with beef and shrimp, a pan seared salmon wrap, and “epic” burgers with an over easy egg or blue cheese.
We definitely had to take advantage of the 30 cent wings, available all day Monday to Thursday (we came on the right day), with the same deal also available at various times during the weekend. But only you order any drink. It was a bar, so we got 20oz beer and a cider at $6 a sleeve. It was nice that each came in their own specialty glass.
The menu claimed that their wings were famous, and that was worth seeing for ourselves. They sounded impressive, but looked on the smaller side when they arrived. But I guess I can’t expect much when paying $3 for 10. The minimum order for each flavour was 10. You choose between either five sauces or four seasonings, and either one of two dips. Reading the menu, I was confused at first. I thought we could stack flavours, choosing one sauce and one seasoning. That wasn’t the case, but they were willing to toss one in the other for 50 cents extra.
My guest choose the lemon pepper, which was a dry rub; and I the honey garlic, which was a lot more saucier. The lemon flavour was strong with a tart and salty finish, and a granulated crunch from a thorough tossing and steep deep fry.
Honey garlic is always a safe bet, and a good comparison point. It made the over cooked wings that much more juicier with its thick and sticky sauce. I was interested in taking a batch home, but was told it wouldn’t be at the 30 cent price. I would have to pay the full price which was $1 per wing at 12 for $12. The wings were good considering how much you had to pay, but they weren’t good enough to pay full price for.
They forgot the blue cheese dipping sauce we had ask for, but at least we weren’t charged for it. Though I could have used it to help change the taste, or better yet: blue cheese with a couple of sticks of vegetables. But once again at $3 a plate, I shouldn’t ask for more.
The “Woody’s presidential election burger” asked you to choose your side for $15 each. It was Trump versus Hilary. We got one of each burger and both were served with their classic thick cut fries. These were some of the nicest, chewy potato fries that I have ever had.
You can’t help but to discuss politics when ordering either of these burgers. It had us speculating over the future of the states and the possibility of a civil war, as predicted by baba vanga, a mystic who has have some of her other predictions come to light. (A really interesting Wikipedia search, I suggest reading it when/if you get the chance.)
As for who would get which burger, we decided the best course of action was to not get too political, and to share both servings splitting both down the middle.
“The Trump Burger” was full of baloney, Russian dressing, and a small pickle. They were clever with their ingredients and jokes. I would have preferred the baloney and pickle as part of the burger filling, instead of them just being toppings that skewered it. The patty for both burgers were fairly thick, and the need for a thorough cook had both on the drier side. Luckily both their sauces were as plentiful as they were humorous.
The Russian dressing in this was similar to a tangy thousand island. But it just made the lettuce soggy and the tomato slip and slide under the pressure of your grip around the crunchy brioche bun.
“The Hillary Burger” came with a slice of spam, Lewinsky sauce, and a sour pickle. I was curious about the sauce, and could only imagine it being white, thick, and unappetizing. So when I saw a dollop of it on the top, and more of it oozing out the side I couldn’t help but chuckle.
It tasted like a watered down ranch dressing, but overall pretty unnoticeable. It was the spam that stole the show for me. Like with the burger above, I wished the toppings were on the inside, rather than just garnish on top. It’s party was also dry and it also proved difficult to maintain between two steady hands.
Would I come back? – Yes.
Would I line up for it? – Yes.
Would I recommend it? – Yes.
Would I suggest this to someone visiting from out of town? – No.
There aren’t too many destination dining spots in my area, so it’s nice to get such a place with such a breath of variety within a 20 minute drive. They are a clean and chill bar spot, with an extensive menu guaranteed to satisfy a great variety of diners. They also have some pretty generous drink and food specials worth coming back more for. And the occasional event and activities with prizes are a nice bonus. Don’t deny your cravings.
935 Brunette Avenue, Coquitlam BC, V3K 1C8